I literally bumped into James at a networking event in downtown Austin. And after I apologized for spilling coffee at his feet, we began idly chatting.
He was there to support his neighbor, the organizer of the event, and I was there to meet cool people like him. Along a 20 minute walk, I learned about the impact love and wealth have had on his life.
He and his wife played their cards right. They reached financial independence six years ago and officially escaped the rat race.
To get to where they are today, James had a long career at Fortune 500 companies, including time at Paramount and Apple.
They now enjoy life on their terms. For James, that means music, cardio and helping startup companies by lending his experience.
I asked if his wife worked, despite their financial independence and he said that it was a big choice for them. Something they had to feel out together.
“When I decided to go independent, or stop working at least unless I felt like it, I didn’t think it was fair for [me] to be one person who had freedom.”
“At first we thought I would only need a break, but I decided in the final year leading up to it, that it’s all or nothing. And it’s been great.”
They jumped into financial independence together.
James had always managed the finances through their marriage. He worked hard to have the ability to make work optional for himself and his wife.
In the later years of James’ corporate career he and his wife traveled the world, managing relationships on behalf of the corporations he was working for.
Traveling was one of the best things they’d done together. “We’ve lived in different countries, requiring us to break from the typical path set by the US status quo.”
Living together in a foreign country allowed them to build a strong and lasting foundation for their marriage.
After years of traveling to manage global corporate relationships in the UK, Ireland and Japan, he and his wife are enjoying staying put in Austin.
A big part of what allows them to live without working is their purchase of their 1960’s home in 2016, before Austin’s property boom. They bought the home “sight unseen” as they were still traveling the globe together.
They updated their home since settling down in Austin and I asked about how they handled the renovation process.
Renovations are complicated and expensive, this can lead to stress and conflict between married partners.
“We always pick a lane that we handle entirely and communicate often,” he said.
This is the first pillar of lasting love in their marriage: Communication
“Go out to a pub and have a non-scripted, non-goal-oriented conversation 2x a week, at least”
Maintaining transparency is a priority for James, it's part of his communication style.
“Be a partnership (no split accounts, lack of transparency),” he advises younger couples. “It’s both of your money, it should be seen that way. But also managed responsibly.”
As the money manager in the relationship, I asked his style and if he had ever made any mistakes with money.
He responded, “Not really, some alt [alternative] investments at small levels, but I follow the advice of Charlie Munger in most cases.”
Charlie Munger is a famous investor and Warren Buffet's long time business partner. He is known for buying wonderful companies at fair prices.
His transparent and open communication their second pillar of lasting love, easier: Trust
When he lost money on these riskier investments his wife had “no reaction”. Not because there wasn't any pain, but because of the trust she has in his ability to manage their money.
James didn't mention this, but I’m confident his wife was updated about how the investments were performing every step of the way. And if she wasn't proactively updated, she had full access to check on their accounts.
By keeping communication open and easy, trust became easier too.
He signed off with two pieces of wisdom that make it easier for them to maintain a strong marriage.
The bottom line is, “have sex” and “Relax. You’ll be dead some day.”
These wise words to live by keep James and his wife wealthy and in love 20 years later.
On your next money date, use this prompt for a discussion and remember James’ story:
